Mary Jo

July 2nd, 2001

"Just remember, Mary Jo, don't get to excited, we are going to turn the sound on now," I was at Oregon Health Science University, in Portland, Oregon, just two months ago, waiting for the first initial sound "hook up" for my MED-EL cochlear implant. Dr. Don Plappinger was trying to make sure I had realistic expectations on my first day, so that I would not be disappointed or overwhelmed. "This right ear hasn't hear sound for over four years, don't expect to understand anything you hear today." "OK, here we go, One, Two, Three, Four, Five," For the first time since my left ear lost its hearing two years ago, I could hear sound. Of course I was excited, but I tried to keep an even keel per the doctors instructions. Right away I could understand a few of his words. As he adjusted the programming, words became clearer. He covered his mouth and tested me. I caught a few words without lip-reading. The part that was most interesting was looking at this male doctor, who now sounded like a tiny, high-pitched woman. There were also three women in the room. Rosemary, a friend who attended the fitting,, an OHSU Audiologist, and Melissa, a MED-EL employee. As everyone took turns speaking to me, I was overwhelmed with the high pitches of their voices and yet, I was thrilled to actually be hearing. Most importantly I was hearing speech. Dr. Plappinger informed me that when I returned the next day we would work on the pitches, and that in the meantime, he stressed, "Don't get to excited or have to high of expectations."

I returned to work that day and was overwhelmed and enthralled by the sounds around me. My ear understood that it was hearing, but my mind was still trying to comprehend that fact. I decided to lay low in my office at the law school, and to just absorb the sounds around me. I told my co-worker which whom I share an office, that I was hooked up to sound, but that I could not understand much yet, although, I did understand a great deal. I kept repeating Dr. Plappinger's words in my mind "Don't get to excited."

The next morning, my co-worker was in a conversation with another, just a few feet away from me. She was saying, "Mary Jo said she can hear me now." I looked up and to the surprise of all three of us, I said, "I can!" I headed out to OHSU for my 24-hour adjustment. Dr. Plappinger helped me work on adding some base sounds to my programming which at first, I didn't hear, but with each word he spoke, it was like a light bulb turned on in my brain, and suddenly, I could comprehend lower tones again. I found this very exciting. I could make out his accent and many of his words without lip-reading. I told him about my co-worker speaking to another, and that I picked out her sentence even though she wasn't addressing me. He saw that as a very good sign. But again, he stressed, "Don't get to excited."

I returned to work that afternoon. Sitting in front of me was a phone that my favorite IT manager, Carla, ordered in hopes that it would soon be put to use, BY ME. I hadn't made a phone call in over two years, not since I lost the hearing in my left ear. Ellie, a good friend of mine, suggested that I call her to test the phone out while typing on AOL instant messenger incase I became stuck." With shaking hands, I dialed up and sure enough, we carried on a phone conversation. I missed a word or two, but for the most part, I understood her very well. All the while, still trying to maintain a calm that Dr. Plappinger stressed. I decided I would make my second phone call to HIM. I will never forget when the receptionist asked me, "My I ask who's calling please" and I said, "Mary Jo." When Dr. Plappinger came online, I do believe he was a little stunned. I remember saying, "Don't worry, I am trying not to get to excited, but I just had to call you and brag a little that I can use the phone." Dr Plappinger said, "No, No Mary Jo, its ok now, its only been 24 hours since hook up, YOU CAN get excited, YOU CAN jump up and down and go out in the hallway and yell, because this IS exciting!" From that moment on, I knew I was a hearing person again.

Four years ago, just out of the blue, I lost all hearing in my right ear. The doctors could only speculate that it may have been due to the fact that when I had scarlet fever as an infant and that it had some impact which may have caused an accelerated a genetic hearing loss tendency. My question and biggest fear was, "How do I prevent this from happening to my left ear?" There was no answer.

At the age of 36, two years ago, my biggest nightmare came true. I woke up one winter morning, after struggling with a nasty head cold that would not go away, and noticed that I could not hear anything around me. Being a single parent with three young children, I was scared. The kids kept trying to talk to me and I could not hear a word they were saying. A trip to the doctor and audiologist confirmed my worst fears. I was now declared profoundly deaf.

The change in my hearing, affected me in many ways. There are no words to describe the isolation that comes with hearing loss. There is nothing that can describe what it is like to be in a world that is so full of sound and yet you can hear none of it. The difficulties and challenges that I encountered after my hearing loss caused severe depression. There were days when I had to force myself to crawl out of bed and face the nightmare of trying to communicate. My brother, Jeff and sister-in-law, Laura, gave me a great deal of support during this time. This depression lasted for about two months. One day I woke up and said to myself, "OK, Mary Jo, this is what happened, now deal with it. Either let this ruin your life or wait until technology finds a way to let you hear again." After that morning, although I still had my dark moments, I tried to look at the brighter side of life. I still had my health, beautiful children, a job, and wonderful support from family, friends and co-workers. So that I was not totally isolated from those around me, I quickly mastered the art of lip-reading as a means of communication.

At work, a local private college, things took a turn for the worse. Although I had outstanding support from two co-workers and friends, Marietta and Shannon, my boss could not and did not want to deal with my hearing loss. So not only was I faced with the trauma of becoming profoundly deaf, I had a boss that wanted me out of his department. After a year of struggling with a discriminating boss and very little support from the HR dept., I transferred from the undergrad campus to the law school, where my hearing loss was not an issue. At the law school, I quickly suggested AOL instant messenger as a means of communication with other employees. Sue and I used it daily to relay work. We still use it over the telephone. Most others learned to use email when communicating with me.

In my private life, I became somewhat reclusive. I avoided new people, group situations and events. I depended greatly on my children, family and friends for communication and awareness to what was going on and for what information I might need. I learned to use the Internet, email and AOL instant messenger for direct communication at work and at home.

Although I lost my hearing, my eyes were never more wide open. I found that there were two main kinds of people in this world; those that treat others, regardless of race, disability and lifestyle, with respect, and those that don't give people who are "different" the time of day. I encountered numerous rude people at work and in public. People who thought that since I could not hear, that I must be dumb, and those who simply avoided me, whether this was out of fear to communicate or lack of respect, I am not sure. I learned not to take their attitudes personally, and decided, that it was their problem, not mine.

I did a great deal of internet research trying to find a solution to my hearing loss and a way to bring me back into the hearing world. I knew that I would hear again someday. There simply was no other option. What I did not know was if that day was going to come soon, or if it was to be many years from now. I searched the cochlear implant sites for information. I found that MED-EL had a newer implant in the U.S.A. under investigational trial only. The company had been in business in Europe (Austria) for many years. They were now reaching out into the U.S.A. market. After gaining approval from my health insurance for the procedure, I met with Dr. Sean McMenonomy and Dr. Don Plappinger to discuss which implant was right for me. My youngest sister, Connie and my Mom, went with me to help me filter the information that we were receiving.

All three of us came away with the feeling that the MED-EL implant was the right choice for me. I made the decision that I wanted the implant to be put into my right ear, even though it had been the longest without hearing (four years vs. my left ear, two years), because I wanted to be able to hear while driving in the car. Outpatient surgery date was set for April 12th, 2001. The week before the surgery, Dr. McMenonomy told me what to expect for recovery. The day of the surgery I was excited and yet filled with apprehension. We had just experienced a very difficult year of watching my older sister battle a terminal brain tumor (Micki died last August). The OHSU staff and doctors were very supportive and understanding. Although I did not recognize her at the time, Lisa Trejo from MED-EL attended my surgery.

After the surgery, I woke up briefly to see Dr. McMenonomy. I questioned him, "So I am going to hear again, right?" and he smiled and did a thumbs up and said, "Yes." With that I sank back into sleep. When I woke up a short time later, my head was pounding. I didn't think I was going to survive. I kept thinking about what my poor sister, Micki must have gone through with brain surgery. Knowing how strong she was, gave me the strength to pull through. My sister, Connie, drove me home. By then, I thought I was doing ok. Although my stomach was a little queasy, I told her she could leave at anytime; I was going to be fine. I was parked on the couch. My oldest son, Noah was due to be home at anytime, my younger children were at my friend, Bev's house, so all I had to do was rest. Connie refused to leave because I had turned white as a ghost. I insisted that I was fine, until I started to throw up. I could have given Linda Blair some fierce competition for a part in The Exorcist. This passed after a few hours. Poor Connie should be given some type of medal for sticking with me through all of that.

After that, my mom, Bev and my sister, Christi rotated shifts. They were concerned because of the amount of headache pain and queasiness that I was experiencing. I couldn't keep food down, and yet I had to take some of the medicine with food. After a few days of care by my private nursing staff, my stomach settled. I wouldn't have made it without them. It took a good two weeks before I could walk without holding on to a wall for support from dizziness. The inner ear fluid took a good four weeks to clear up, but after that, I just had to wait until my first "hook-up" appointment.

After those first two days of hook-up and programming, it has all improved rapidly. With Dr. Plappinger working his magic in the programming of the MED-EL implant, sounds are now very close to what I remember. I will never forget the day I heard a kitty cat meow or the sound of birds singing. Tears ran down my face when I heard the laughter and giggles of my younger children, Ben and Joelle. Never again will I have to sit and wonder what song is being sung at their school holiday programs. The second day of my new hearing, my oldest son, Noah, lead me to a chair and played music for me. He wanted me to hear a song by The Backstreet Boys, called, The Perfect Fan. It is a song about a mom that is always there, supporting her children. After we listened to the song, he hugged me and we both cried.

Work has become more interesting as the days go by. I am floored by hearing co-workers voices for the first time. Some are very different from what I ever imagined. Hearing again has opened up many new opportunities. I have been approached about two different job opportunities that I could not have performed well while being deaf.

There are no words that can describe the isolation that is associated with hearing loss. We live in a world the heavily relies on sound for communication, emergencies, and entertainment. Those that cannot hear miss a huge piece of this puzzle we call life, whether we realize what we are missing or not. No person should be deprived from the sounds of laughter, animals, music, rain falling, thunder, children's voices, and a baby crying. I was born a hearing person, I knew what I was missing and with the help of a MED-EL cochlear implant, a great team of doctors, support from family, friends, co-workers and large amount of faith, I was able to rejoin the hearing world just a few months ago. Hearing again has given me a whole new lease on life. I will never again take for granted this sense we call hearing. To hear again, is truly a miracle.

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